'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (2025)

Culture

‘It’s all just conveniently swept under the rug.’

Anna Good

Posted on March 31 2025 7:00 am CDT

User u/DealSoggy6952 recently took to the AskReddit sub to ask therapists, “What’s been your biggest ‘I know I’m not supposed to judge, but holy sh*t’ moment?” In the world of therapy, professionals strive to maintain objectivity and refrain from judgment. This thread reveals instances where therapists found this neutrality tested.

The importance of therapy to deal with trauma

Therapists often encounter cases involving severe trauma, abuse, and neglect. Maintaining professional boundaries while managing personal reactions is a delicate balance. According to a study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, many therapists report experiencing significant emotional distress related to their clients’ experiences, something that is called “countertransference.”

According to an article on Talkspace, 20% of adults in the United States experience mental health issues, and the number goes up to 25% globally. Additionally, “9.8 million Americans, will experience a mental illness this year that is serious enough to interfere with or impact major life activities.” Meanwhile, 21.4% of kids from the age of 13-18 also have mental health disorders, many of them needing therapy to process.

There are also moments from people who are completely unaware that what they are saying or doing is wrong. In these instances, the therapists say they struggle to keep their professionalism in the face of negligence or obliviousness.

Here are 18 AskReddit stories from therapists about clients who pushed them to the brink of judgment:

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (2)

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (3)

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (4)

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (5)

5. “I had a preteen client whose guardian kept requesting progress notes to see how they’ve “been doing”. It’s against clinic policy for clients and parents/guardians to have access to the notes; they’re allowed to have access to everything else though.
The client was “very defiant” to everyone but was a wonderful kid throughout their treatment with me. When I met both with the guardian and parent, who both insisted on knowing everything about the kid, everything started making sense.
Once the parent requested to switch therapists only because I declined their request to the notes, I knew how unhealthy the family dynamics were. I felt bad for the kid because they were opening up more about the family dynamics and how they impacted them; we had a good therapeutic relationship.”—u/Spiritual-Map1510

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (6)

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (7)

'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (8)

“I was in the mental hospital after trying to kms and this poor guy was so zonked out on meds and it was because his parents died and then a week later his daughter and fiancé died.
4 people in one month. I don’t know how anybody is supposed to carry so much all at once. But they just put him on meds and tried to tell him life is worth living. Felt like they were addressing depression instead of grief. I think about him sometimes and that was 6 years ago.”—u/HelpfulAnt9499

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (9)

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (10)

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (11)

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“Maybe not the holy sh*t you’re thinking of but I get that feeling when I think about all of the ways my clients have been able to go on with their lives despite how much sh*t they have had to carry.”—u/PurpleConversation36

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (12)

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (13)

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (14)

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (15)

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'4 people in one month': 18 therapists share the wildest moments that tested their professional neutrality (16)

For more information about suicide prevention or to speak with someone confidentially, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (U.S.) or Samaritans (U.K.).

If you are a teen dealing with depression or other mental health issues, see PBS.org for a list of resources and organizations that can help you. If you are an adult, see Mental Health Resources.

If you are a survivor of domestic abuse or want more information on domestic violence and resources for victims, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline online or at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

More AskReddit roundups:

‘No one believed me when I told them’: 15 people who knew a murderer before they killed share their stories
‘Toddlers tell you’: 20 women share what being ‘ugly’ feels like
‘Have you ever had a muscle knot?’: 20 doctors on the biggest mysteries about the human body that science still can’t explain

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